Let's Change the Conversation

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I adore the women I work with and have never left a single one thinking “She would have been great if only she was a size smaller or had prettier knees”.

I am blessed to spend my days with so many phenomenal women offering the world a variety of talents and passions. This exposure helps me spot trends far beyond fashion. The trend I find more distressing than Uggs is how many of us are stuck with our own negative inner dialogue about trivial things like how much we hate our thighs, our arms or wrinkled toes!

Why are we, as women hard-wired to look for our own flaws?

Even my clients who have what popular media would deem a “perfect figure” are quick to point out their so-called imperfections. Ladies, can we please change the conversation? Spending time and energy focussing on and complaining about our “flaws” is not only a disservice to society it is not interesting conversation.

The women I work with are amazing. They are running companies, raising wonderful children, working as doctors, lawyers, teachers, operating non-profits and even innovating ways to end the sex trade. They are loving partners, supportive friends, kind, smart and full of what Brené Brown calls badassery. Let’s talk about these things, the things that inspire us, the things we love, let’s ask deeper questions, seek to understand our differences and learn from each other.

The media is making a lot of progress when it comes to changing our standard of beauty and I applaud those advancing that conversation but we still have a long way to go. One trend that bothers me is the “real women have curves, love handles, cellulite, etc.”

I have been styling real women for over a decade and I am here to tell you some have curves, some don’t, some are a size 2 others are size 22 but the fact remains, they are all real women.

The above photo is the project I am most proud. It is part of a photoshoot I did for a fashion company. All of the women in the photo are incredibly beautiful and more importantly they are all doing their part to make their world a better place.

Bill Cunningham said it best "Those who seek beauty will find it". In this photo I wanted to celebrate the complexities of women instead of defining them by the typical categories. I marvel at the innovation of youth and the wisdom of maturity. I find beauty in both the delicate and strong female forms. I believe all women are real and all women are beautiful.

Let’s celebrate real women, celebrate ourselves, and change the conversation. The responsibility is not just for the media and fashion companies but it also lies at the roots of our dialogue. The charge to change the conversation is between ourselves in our inner circles, between mothers and daughters and especially between ourself and the mirror.

If you seek beauty, you will find it (if you seek cellulite, you will find it). Seek wisely!